And It's Not Even A Full Moon

Every day is a busy day anymore with staffing levels. So we look at our call sheet when we are heading out to the field to assess what needs to be done the most urgently. I'm looking at my call sheet and see this one call for a pick up of 8 dogs in some one's apartment. That just doesn't seem right. Of coarse what does go through my head is either someone found a litter of puppies OR their dog had a litter and they are trying to get rid of them without paying a fee.
I decided to give the CP a call to find out what was going on. I took note that the address was in a pretty ghetto area, so there were possibilities that the dogs had been abandoned. The CP answered and I told her who I was and asked her if the dogs were a mom and puppies. She said that some of them were. I asked her if there were 8 or was that a typo, she stated that there were actually 13 dogs she had a couple of the neighbor kids count them.
Were they small dogs? Some are.
How did they get into your apartment? I don't know, I took my own dogs out about 4am and they were here when I came back.
Do you have a roommate or someone living in your house that maybe brought them in? No, my daughter is in LA. I just don't know how they could have all gotten up in here! I can't even go in my bedroom because that big shepherd looking one growls at me when I even open the door. They are everywhere! Hiding behind my couch, be hind the TV stand and under the TV stand. They are just every where! There is a mother dog with puppies behind the TV one of the puppies is under it. I can see it's eyes.
I can't even begin to explain all the scenarios gong through my head. I knew I had to see this for myself. I had that inkling that there was something off about this CP. But I could be wrong. This woman was very serious sounding, her speech wasn't slurred, she was very articulate sounding, she didn't stumble over words or give me any indication that she was off her medication or self medicating.
I told her that I would be there in approximately half and hour. She thanked me profusely and told me she has been sitting on her front porch since 4am she is so afraid to go into her apartment.  I assured her that I would be there as soon as I could, barring any emergencies.
Oh, there is one more thing I hope that you can get. There is a baby rattlesnake under the TV stand.
BING BING BING!! The cookoo alarm in my head just when off full tilt.
I asked if she was sure that it was a snake? Isn't one of the puppies under there? How did it get there? Oh I think one of the dogs must have brought it in. Please hurry?
Of coarse, I will be there as soon as possible. I need to make a call to see if another officer will be able to help me with all those dogs, my truck won't hold that many.
So I hang up with her. I would have been speechless had anyone else been with me. This was just too good to not share! So I called 460. She was the South Officer for the day and I was the North.
I gave her the whole story between episodes of laughter. She agreed that two officers were needed for this call. IF there were 13 dogs no way I would be able to handle that load, and OFFICER SAFETY.
She was about as far out as I was, so we would meet there.
We did arrive at about the same time. We both rolled into one of the most ghetto-fied apartment complexes in the area.
There was the CP, sitting on the front porch of her Second Story Apartment. She waved to us as we found our parking spots. 460 and I came together and both exchanged the "look". You know the one where you look over the top of your sunglasses at each other knowing what each other is thinking? Ya, that look.
So we climbed the stairs to meet the CP at the top. First thing I notice is her two little dogs barking furiously at us. Then I notice her eyes. Blood shot, glassy with a hind of yellow tinge. I am half listening to her hush at her dogs and explain where the dogs are hiding in her apartment. The front door is wide open and I can see that both the couch and love seat across the room appear to have been shredded. Stuffing coming out everywhere. I enter her apartment with her and 460 stands by near the door. I begin to search the room using my flashlight to check every crevice and dark places. My first stop is the TV and Stand where the mom dog, puppies and snake are suppose to be. The CP is pointing from across the room Right there! Right behind there!
Nothing.
Nothing behind the TV. Nothing under that TV stand, which by the way is only about 1-2 inches off the ground. I search behind the couches and boxes in corner. Nothing.
The CP is insistent that I check the TV stand again. I stand in front of the TV and ask the CP to show me where she sees the dogs. She insists that there is one starring at her right now, she can see it's beady little eyes. So I get down as far as I can with out laying on the floor and look into the dark 1 1/2 inch high space.
I was using my flash light. Nothing.
I stood back up and told her nothing was there. Where else?
Well, where did they go?They were all in here! I swear I am NOT going crazy!
Uh, Ya you are. Your already passed there lady. Of coarse I didn't say this out loud. But I did look over at 460 and could read her mind as well. And she was thinking the same thing.
We checked the bedroom for the one she insisted way growling at her. Nope.
We checked under her kitchen table and her spare room. Nothing.
We checked behind the washer and dryer, and even showed her that snakes were not poking their little heads out from under her washer.
Back to the living room. She is still insistent that they are behind the TV. So I look behind it again.
She points to the spot next to where I am standing.
If you move the big brown one you'll see the puppies!
Where? I can see the empty space she is staring at.
It's right There!...It's wagging it's tail!
I wave my hand in the empty space. Right here?? :wave wave wave:
It was time for us to end this case. We would be there all day, looking for invisible animals. I still couldn't tell if she was off her meds or ON something. Other than seeing invisible dogs and snakes. She seemed perfectly fine.
He neighbor came out and yelled at her, I told you there wasn't nothing in there!
But she was still convinced. She still insisted that they were there, hiding. I told her that if they came back, what she needs to do is get them all in a box and bring them down to the shelter. We will take them for free!
We got in our trucks and drove out. As we did I called 460 and warned her not to look and roll up her window. CP was on her balcony trying to get our attention. Drive Drive Drive!
We got the heck outta there. We drove just down the street to an empty lot. It wasn't until there we could safely burst out in laughter at the whole situation! Just as we started to discuss whether to call APS County Central calls me on the radio.
They said that the CP from the Call I was just at called back, she said the dogs are back and there are about 10 hiding behind her front door. That must have been where they had been hiding...Uh is there anything we need to know about this CP?
Uh, yes that is affirmative, she's a 5150. No danger to herself or others but if she continues to call in might want to have SSD or APS go out and check on her.
And I got 4 more phone calls from her on my cell, just let it go to voicemail.

I entered my report in that evening being as professional as possible without ad-libbing remarks.
460 simply put in, Assisted 461 with invisible animals.
Priceless!